This year is the worst. I wanted to work at a certain place during summer, didn’t get to do that. So I worked where I’ve always worked – which is good money so no complaints more that that it would have been nice to work somewhere that has to with my new education to do.

My boyfriend and I are still in a shitty place. My bromance is having a heterosexual heart and I have fallen in love. I’m tired of commuting from home, to university, to work, to university, between two homes with two men that don’t bother to be nice to me any longer. Because I’m down. Who the fuck will hire me? I’m old. I’m not bright. I’m nothing.

And my mother passed away. Suddenly. I talked to her on the phone the day before and was all like “Sure I’ll pop around for a coffee tomorrow, talk later” and then she died in her sleep. Which is a good way to go actually: no hospital scenery (I hate those), no pain, no nothing. Just peaceful. (Ok, here both men actually pulled themselves together and were very nice and caring).

And now. I just want to sell everything and move. Do nothing. Figure out who me be so to speak. Also I need comfort sex. And sun. Winter is coming.